Thursday, 1 September 2016

The bad date roll call

Bad first date stories
postcard saying hello


After seeing another blogger tweeting about a date from hell recently, I thought it was time to put a post together about bad dates. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had some absolutely brilliant dates in the past, but let’s face it, bad dates make better anecdotes. Here’s the top few stand-out dates.

The one with forced hand-holding
A few years back, I went on my first POF date and it was back before I was good at dealing with awkward situations. Sigh. He turned up at his venue of choice (Yates) and it was immediately obvious that he wasn’t 5’9. He admitted that he couldn’t handle his drink, proceeded to drink a double for every single I had and between bars forcibly held my hand. No amount of carrying my bag over my arm could stop him as he’s just dart around the back of me to my other side to grab my free hand. After a few bars and him ending up wasted, he disappeared off to the station where apparently his mum was picking him up.

The one I met at speed-dating
This guy admitted that he couldn’t remember anything we spoke about on the night and I’m not entirely sure he knew which girl would be turning up. It turns out 5 minutes was most certainly long enough and after an hour of painfully dull conversation, we parted ways.

The crossfit wanker
Why I ever decided to drive to a date, I do not know. Whilst I don’t struggle to be a great sober date, this guy spent the entire night telling me about how crossfit is the best thing since sliced bread and about how every person who did alternative exercise was doing it wrong.

The serial re-arranger
There’s always one who you get on with well enough to want to meet but pinning them down to a time and a place is as tricky as catching smoke. I went on several dates with one guy, over the course of several months, because of the re-arranging and pre-planning it took.

The personality catfish
You know when you exchange messages with someone and think, yes, you’re funny, you’re engaging, this could be really fun? It’s a massive shame when they show up and it’s like trying to draw blood from a stone. As someone who can talk, a lot, I don’t normally struggle to make conversation, but this night turned into a one drink wonder.

The appearance catfish
There’s always one. It turns out a filtered, black and white photo can make you look like an entirely different person. Whilst I’m not saying looks are everything, it’s pretty important to look like your photos when you’re meeting someone off the internet, if anything so you don’t walk up to the wrong person. (This actually happened to my friend when he was seconds away from approaching the wrong girl before realising his date was there and that he’d been catfished).


All in all, I don’t think I’ve had any truly terrible dating disasters, but these are my worst. Have you had any Tinder nightmares? Tell me what happened in the comments!
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2 comments

  1. ha, I feel bad for how amuzing this is! I've actually never been on a proper date!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I mean, at least you got some stories? Haha! I feel for you. I think sometimes it's easier to deal with really bad rather than awkward odd people.

    ReplyDelete

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