Friday, 9 October 2015

Spies Travel – Do It For Mom (is a shit idea)

Spies Travel Do it for Mom
I saw this viral video by Spies Travel with their 'Do it for Mom' campaign and you know what? It made me want to revisit that brick wall and bang my head against it. 




I get that it's a PR stunt. I get that they made the video to get it shared all over the internet and the fact that I'm sat here typing these words is entirely 'supporting' their campaign in terms of coverage. But still. What monumental dickheads. 

The video is all about how birth rates in Denmark have dropped and Spies Travel have started the 'Do it for Mom' campaign which focuses on parents making a donation towards a decent holiday for their kids in the hope that they'll go away, shag a lot and conceive a child. A child which fulfils the wishes of the parents to become grandparents.

Aside from some cringe scenarios, the video explains why being active can increase your sex drive and that sending your kid and their partner on an active holiday could increase your chance of a conception. It's all about how if you're not going to 'do it for Denmark', you'll 'do it for Mom' and give her the grandchild she's always wanted.

Are these people having a laugh? 

Could there be any worse reason to have a child than just to please your parents? (There probably are but planning to have a child for someone else’s benefit rather than because you actually want one is pretty damn stupid). If you haven't had kids, there are probably reasons for that (financial, circumstantial, medical and the like) and putting a smile on your mum's face probably won't change those reasons. 

I really, really hate the message in this video. Not every woman wants kids. Not every woman can have kids. 

Women who can't have kids can watch it and feel inadequate, like they're letting their mum down and that they're not full-fulling the needs of the country. Lovely.

Women who don't want kids can watch it and feel an added bit of societies' pressures to procreate.

I'll come out and say it, having kids is not on my radar at all. And some people seem to think that makes it an open subject to debate. Sigh.

I've been told I'm cold, heartless, I'm not normal, I lack maternal instinct. I even recently had 'Lizi's the one who doesn't want kids' be declared to a table of people as my defining characteristic. Yep. That happened. Again, sigh.

Whether or not a woman wants to have a child is entirely her business. It's not up for discussion by anyone. You know how we all go on about equal rights, women being empowered and the like? Yeah, that. It’s called being able to make your own decision without judgement.

Right now, it doesn't even enter my mind that I want a child. Yes, that could change in the future. I'm no mystic Meg, I can't predict that shit. But do I want to give up my lifestyle to intentionally have a child within the near future? No, I bloody well don't. Taking up to 9 months off work for me right now would be very much make or break in my career, I live in a one bedroom flat, I don’t have a particularly highly paying job and I'm single. Actively planning a child right now would be downright irresponsible of me. 

Putting pressure on women to have kids is really quite horrific. How many people claim to be a 'feminist' yet would turn round and say 'but you'll change your mind'. (Kindly keep your patronising stance to yourself, as you also are not psychic). 

Many women have a lot of deeply personal reasons to not want children. I personally don't, but please stop and think that there could be issues that aren't been shared. Issues like being abused, having an abortion, having a miscarriage, being raped. You know, things that might give you doubts about having children that you wouldn’t share with a wider audience. And some women? They just decide they don't want to. And that is fine. As women have the right to make that decision, without being judged.

So Spies Travel, I think your PR campaign is frankly shite. I think you need to readdress the message you're sending out and perhaps you could work towards empowering women to make their own choices instead of piling on the pressure.

Oh and if there are women out there who are seriously piling the pressure on their kids to give them a grandchild? Kindly have a word with yourself and stop being so god-damned selfish. Put the happiness of the child you’re blessed to have first, before trying to consider grandchildren that don’t even exist yet.


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